I Lay in bed crying last night. I thought back to all the bad things i have ever done.
Cutting, puking after meals, locking people in bathrooms and closets, attempting a poison a girl, stabbing a boy with a pencil, trying to rip my teachers scalp off, lying, cheating, playing mean tricks and more.
I begged God for forgiveness. I really am not a bad person! All this happened from the time I was 14 to the age of 20.
For 9 years, its like i have been “Sober” I haven’t hurt or have urges to hurt others.
I dont want to be judged writing this a blog. I promise you, it wasnt the real me who did these bad things. It was a demon inside called schizophrenia.
She gives me the ability to hear and see things others cant. I get urges to do bad things.
But i have overcome SO much!!
I cant even imagine hurting another person. I would NEVER.
I just want to make sure i am going to heaven.
So Please, dear Lord…accept me into your heaven one day when the day to die comes..
Id appreciate it……