Its been a three day in a row routine. I lay in bed at 9:00 pm trying to sleep. I cant sleep so i check my facebook around 1:00 am. I turn off my cell and the voices start.
I heart bad voices for the past three days!! Usually its the good or neutral voices.
Jack told me i should cut the fat off my stomach. I had the scissors but in the back of my head, I knew i shouldnt do it. SO i just scratched my belly and that seemed to work.
I lay back down and Jack came back. This time he downgraded me for a full 13 minutes. I am a bitch, i am a loser, i am fat, i am worthless. It really upset me!
I started to cry, I felt so lonely. I thought about waking my Mom so i wouldn’t have to be alone.
But i didnt, because by then my meds have kicked in and i was heavy.
So i cried.
Soon i had a bad headache.
I finally fell asleep. But this happened three days in a row like i am on a new schedule.