Sucking on my arm to see BLOOD!

I started having anxiety when i was in 3rd grade. My parents got me tested because i got dizzy and anxious often, but I was not put on medication for it until i was 16.

I started to hear voices when i was in 1st grade. I remember having invisible friends that were SO real to me, so real. But they wernt.

When i look back to being 7 years old, i remember leaving school a lot because of what i was dealing with.

I never told my parents or doctors that i was hearing voices, because at the time, i didnt know i was the only one who could hear them.

In 4th grade, i started to suck on my arm to raise blood to the surface of my skin that later turned into a bruise.

7th to 8th grade i went to a school that didnt accept me and my issues. I started to cut around that time and developed an eating disorder.

I got pulled out of that school and enrolled into therapy school.

I was then put on Clozapine which is the strongest med for schizophrenia, well one of the strongest

The voices got better, i stopped throwing up after meals and i didnt cut.

I was now dealing with weight gain from Clozapine.

I went from 106 to 135 in weeks. I got depressed and admitted into psych wards every few months.

It sucked.

These days i feel better, but i still struggle with voices and weight gain.

I am trying to stay positive.


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