I keep forcing myself to do stuff i dont really want to do. Little things. Such as: My brain says its 9:30, time for bed. BUt i am not tired. But i am forced by my brain to go to sleep. even though i am in the middle of a text with my friends.
Also like, I am watching Teen Mom and there is only the last 5 minutes to go and I HAVE to brush my teeth, knowing i would miss the ending.
Part of me wants to see what happens, but my brain says I MUST brush my teeth, right now.
I force myself to read when i dont want to, i force myself to hang with friends even though i like being alone.
I dont understand the way my brain thinks and its only getting worse. I feel confused daily and I feel like my mind is getting mushy.
I think there is something physically wrong with my brain, not just mentally.
Plus my mind is SO busy 24/7. I cant get a break. Fortunately my shrink put me on a new medication and has helped with my sleeping issues.
But i still wake up every hour to look at the time.
IF i dont see the time at that moment i will freak out and cant sleep until, i look at the time.