Cups of Puke, hidden under my bed

“Dont tell anyone about this” A whispered. We were in the room we shared in the psych ward. We both had eating disorders and were monitored after meals. SInce we couldnt use the bathroom for 3 hours after meals, A and i would drink lots of water and throw up in Styrofoam cups. We hid them under our beds.

After a day, our room started to stink. The staff noticed and found the cups full of puke. We got in BIG trouble and they separated us.

I was sent to a single room. I Had no way to throw up with out getting caught. I was so afraid of gaining weight. I had made it down to 98 lbs.

I had to drink protein drinks because i wasnt eating enough.

A got discharged and i had no other Friends in the unit. So i got depressed. If parents bring you magazines at visiting hours, staff had to take out the staples.

One staple got snucked in and I used it to cut my belly.

I was so lonely and so depressed.

i was there for 9 days and it was not fun, no freedom, i couldnt even wear a bra with underwire for safety issues. I felt naked…


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