Punching my stomach, hearing voices, being admitted and no shoe laces allowed.

I sat in the corner of the kids therapy room. I was the oldest one there but definitely not the most mature.

I punched my stomach over and over, each punch harder then the next.

“Emily Stop.” Lisa grabbed my hands. She held them tightly so i couldn’t move.

“Im going to throw up” i said.

“You are not going to throw up, now stop this S***” I started to cry. My tears turned to sobs. I was so confused what was going on in my brain.

Lisa let go of my hands. She left the room. I was hearing voices so i put my hands over my ears trying to block the noise. Lisa came back with a pair of thick head phones. She put them on my ears. i looked her in the eye not daring to blink. What could she see in my eyes? Could she see the pain that was in my heart?

I grabbed her and embraced her into a big hug.

“Its okay hunny” Lisa said “We are going to get you help” I cried and cried.

Lisa took my hand and led me to her office. She sat me in a chair and made a phone call.

“I have a client here that needs to be admitted” Lisa said. I shook my head hard. She ignored me.

“OK thank you” She hung up.

together we waited in the lobby. Next door, the inpaitent therapy, was getting a bed ready for me to be admitted.

Lisa walked me over there and they took the laces off my shoes. I sat there scared as ever.

“They will take care of you Emily” Lisa hugged me.

“I will check in tomorrow” Lisa left.

“Follow me Emily” Staff said. I followed her to the bathroom. she strip searched me and i cried and cried. i got my room and climbed under the blankets. I wanted to go home so bad. I was a frightened kitten.

I thought back to today and replayed what had gone on. If it weren’t for those dang voices, i would be in my own bed that night.

 

 

 

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