I look at my wrist and my eyes move up my arm. Inside those veins are rushing with my medication. They are suppose to help with voices, counting, anxiety, and hallucinating.

Why don’t they work?

I mean, things are not terrible, but things are always better when in am in the psych ward. I start to feel great after a day or two of being admitted.

Then I go home, and things get worse.

I feel pretty good, but I still hear voices. I still count. I still have anxiety and paranoid thoughts.

I am scared I will have to deal with this the rest of my life. Taking 15 pills a day, therapy, hearing disturbing voices, blood work monthly and more.

I don’t really care that I take meds, its the side effects that suck: weight gain, drooling..


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