I had a strange idea I once acted upon. I was in 11th grade at school. I was having another hard day, so I was in the quiet room. Lately my hands have been feeling dirty, so I used a lot of anti bacterial soap. That particular day, my mouth tasted like metal. So I tried to wash it, with the anti bacterial soap.
I squeezed some in my hand, about the same size of two quarters. I ate it. All of it. It. Was. Disgusting!
Then I panicked “IS this stuff poison!?” I grabbed the anti bacterial soap and ran to the nurse. I told her what I had just done. She called the poison control. Fortunately it was not deathly.
Deep inside though, I almost with it were poison. It would be an easy way to die. Back then everything I did or though was about death. I would cut, I would punch myself and try to strangle myself.
I am just glad I didn’t succeed.
