Listening to music while being sad

I was happy 10 minutes ago. Then I turned on my music. Again, White Houses by Vanessa Carlton. I don’t know why I torcher myself. It was the song I listened to over and over and over on the way to my first psych ward. Every time I listen to it, I get sad.

But I love that song and it makes me feel safe. Hard to explain. I get sad, but have to smile.

I love how different music can bring up different emotions: sad, happy…of course I would rather be happy. But sometimes I like to cry and feel sad..just for a few moments.

I am generally a happy person. It takes a lot to bring me down.

I try to smile 24/7. Although that is not realistic, neither is my life.

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