I try so hard to ignore the voices. EVERYTIME I am in the car, I have urges to take the wheel and crash. The voices have yet to tell me to, but I am SO scared they will, and I will obey, and crash.
I have to pinch my arms to stop myself and listen to music to distract myself.
I told MA the other day how when I get mad I do two negative things: Cut or throw up. She wants me to work on other ideas I can do, positive things. Such as snap an elastic on my wrist.
I get so frustrated. I am coloring in my adult coloring book, and get out of the lines a TINY bit. I get angry and rip it up. I must start over. Why do I do that!? I GET NOWHERE.